When I sat by that water tank in the cold July at 2 am alone and waiting , I should have known it was not healthy
When he put me in a cab at 2 am knowing so well I didn’t have my house keys and I had to sleep over( well I barely slept) at a old college friend whom I hadn’t spoken to for over four years , I should have known he never cared
When I was accused of flirting in church with someone just because the guy complemented my singing I should have known there were deep underlying issues (that may have not involved me) that he needed to take care of.
When I was given silent treatment for over a month, I should have known communication during strife will be an uphill task.
But No ..
I didn’t ..
Because when you love you don’t give up, even when it hurts.
Because when he came back we talked and he looked like everything was gonna be alright
Because sometimes a second time you will do it better.
Better it looked
But this time I was more broken. I was so messed up that for months I was an empty husk, moving around simply because I had to. I could not recognize who I was for close to a year.
Were it not for a REDEEMER who looked down and by GRACE He reached out, I would be dead by now. GONE
Were it NOT for GOD who sees deeper than anyone else, Who knew me by name. The devil would have had his way.
Relationships ( all) are part of God’s plan for our lives but if we are not careful we may end up missing on our destiny. They will either draw us to God or destroy us.
- When it draws you away from God. A healthy relationship will ensure you are more insync with your creator
- When you do not have peace about it. Constant turmoil will wear you down. A right relationship brings peace since you are right with God, your partner and yourself
- When More is demanded than you can Give. When a relationship makes you feel like you are empty yet more pouring is required, it’s time to reevaluate. Once you feel overwhelmed, something may be terribly wrong. A healthy relationship will have these needs balanced. When you feel the burden to give is so heavy, take a step back. Secondly, a relationship is not a MARRIAGE, do not give marriage priviledges to boyfriends.
- There is an element of FEAR. Perfect love casts out fear. Enough said.
- It constantly demands PERFECTION. We are prone to make mistakes, and this requires forgiving. Beware of someone who will punish by making you work so hard for forgiveness. It’s only the CHRIST in us that perfects us. We are prone to mistakes.
As women, we were created to love and nurture and that’s why its always difficult to notice subtle signs of emotional abuse. We tend to make excuses for them thereby feeling this ugly monster. I know , you know, that you are not being treated right. We were taught to love but no one taught us how to stop loving. Sometimes,we hold onto it way longer than we should.
The biggest lesson I learnt from mine was that only God can put two people together and sustain them. Its all useless if it doesn’t start with the ultimate CREATOR of relationship.
Did God put you together, was it yourselves, was it your aunt or was it your PASTOR?